Monday, February 9, 2009

Little Miss Giggles On My Arse.

I think it's Little Miss Giggles. It's one of those characters. She's pink and cute and she's plastic with goo in her so that when you put her in the fridge she gets cold and is good for owies.

I actually bought her for T.

But she's tucked into the waistband of my sweats right now.

Let me backtrack a little...

I finally got to pick up my minivan this afternoon... She's been in the shop for a week-and-a-half. Which meant I've been driving a rental all that time... And, of course, it's a head gasket, which, apparently, is rather expensive... And, of course, it's longer than a week, so I have to keep the rental.

Anyway.

Today it was ready. And T wanted to go with us to get the car. So, I got to see my kidlet on a Monday, which was amazing... The hugging, the kissing, the catching up. The getting to just listen to him... Gawd, I nearly cried from the awesomeness of it!!

And then there was the total at the car rental place. Which shocked me. And I threw a bit of a tantrum. And saved myself $35. Mad skillz.

So, I took my boy back to his dad's and said goodbye.

And then I went to the supermarket and got home after 6. It wasn't long until the Cable Guy came back. And I was busy with the vacuum cleaner and such, but ready to just relax... Which I did... With a decent Cabernet and some Lindt 70% Cocoa...

And then I checked my phone, which had been on the charger all evening... And realized I'd missed T's call. Devastated, I dialed into voicemail... And got an "urgent" message from some man telling me that I don't belong in the carport at my apartment complex, and that I would get towed tonight at 11...

I kinda freaked out... Especially when I realized they'd probably called since my number is on the back window of my minivan (it's for business)... Of course, it was a "private" number...

So, I wrote a note to put on the back of my van... Saying I had just moved in and that this was my assigned carport spot, and to please not tow my car...

I took off down the stairs, slightly tipsy, and ended up slipping down the last few, landing on my arse, having scraped it on the last step... I worried that I may have broken a toe, but I think it was just scraped a bit... But I hurt... And all I could think was that I shouldn't have even been out there... But someone thought I didn't belong in my own parking spot!!

I left the note on the back of my van....

And realized there was a note on my windshield... Written on an envelope... In all caps: "YOU DON'T LIVE HERE DON'T PARK HERE YOU DIDN'T PAY FOR IT"... And I thought to myself, "My arse hurts, and yes, I do live here... That wasn't very nice..."

I removed the note and turned it over, hoping there was a name or a phone number... But, no... The coward had written more... "YOU PARK LIKE ****! THANKS FOR NOTHING!"

Okay, now wait a minute... I actually looked to see if I had parked like **** (I'm assuming that means "like shit")... And I didn't... I was within the lines... Like, six inches within the line!

WTF????

I freaking lost it.

Bawling, I called M... Woke him up. So sad I'd missed T, but freaking out that my car would be towed and that I wouldn't have a way to get to work in the morning... M reassured me that they have my car on record at the complex and that I'm okay. They won't tow me.

How fucking stupid will my jackass neighbor feel when they realize they put a nasty note on their neighbor's car???

I wanted to put a note on their car introducing myself... And saying "thank you for welcoming me to the neighborhood..."

I didn't.

I called AZGirl, bawling... Hysterical... Just wanting to go to sleep and bask in the glory that was the awesome Cabernet... But, no. Someone had to be all cowardly. Who doesn't even deserve it.

So, I'll go to sleep now... With my phone nearby... So if they do decide to tow me and call first, I can tell them that whomever is the asshole who parks next to me is a jerk and that I do pay for that spot.

If not, at least I know that M will drive me to work... But I swear, if I have to pay to get my car outta impound, my neighbor is gonna have to pay for it....

Because I've spent enough on my car today... And while every penny was worth the extra hour I got with my son, I will NOT pay for some jerk to be a jackass to me.... Oh, no.

Thanks, AZGirl, who told me to ice my arse... 'Cause I know I'll be feeling that tomorrow!

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