Thursday, July 9, 2009

Well, speak of the devil...

In my last post, I mentioned something about When I decided to stay away from the one who needs me to stay away, there was no closure... No conversation in which we mutually decided to stop speaking. Nope. There was just me. Deleting the phone number from my phone. Cutting the internet ties. And then... Nothing. And while a conversation would have given me something to reflect upon later, I don't think it would have been as positive as it could have been. So, I just left it. And I'm mostly pretty peaceful about that.

So, that was yesterday.

And last night I'm out for a wonderful meal with a dear friend, I got this weird text. I totally thought it was a facebook update... What with the string of numbers and all.

Um, yeah. Not quite. Turns out that string of numbers was from a phone number that my phone doesn't recognize... Because I'd deleted it.

And it was this disgusting text about something he was freaking out about... Including intimate details that he really shouldn't have ever shared with anyone outside of his marriage. Especially another woman.

Ugh. Ew. Ew. Ew.

And while it was tempting to respond with something along the lines of, "Yeah, well, I've been laid off and I've got some health stuff going on, so your problems with your wife are not exactly high priority on my list right now," I didn't.

I just told him that this was not my problem.

And he responded moments later. And I didn't respond.

And I giggled to CoffeeLady about how I took the ball from where it sat in my court and ran inside with it and hid it.

This brings me joy.

Because this person used to have a pretty fierce grip on me and the ol' self-esteem. And his opinion of me really mattered. He really mattered.

But now he grosses me out.



I got my closure. This was just validation that I can be done and stay done. Because I made a decision to stay away and I am doing it. I'm totally doing it.

Z's asking today if there's any such thing as coincidence.

Um, no.

So, right now I'm sending some extra L&L to a woman and a kid that I've never met. And, I suppose, to him, too. Because I really do want them to be happy together. Because that's what they promised to do.

And I refuse to be a party to anybody else's marital issues.

Oh, and I totally wasn't going to blog this. I was going to keep it under my hat (but on top of the pigtails with the matching rubber bands! LOL!)...

But then I saw that she wrote about how I helped her without even realizing I helped her... Because I'd written something that spoke to her.

So, maybe this will speak to someone, too.


Light and Love... Peace... ClaRiTy... Zen.

From up here on that damned high road... Again. Eesh. LOL!


  1. Don't hide the ball! That means you could come across it again and put it back in play. Destroy it or pass it off to someone else to continue the game.

  2. Ooh, that's good. Thanks.

    ::wraps up ball and mails it to his wife::

  3. I mailed a ball back once...It's cheaper if you fold it up and put it in a flat rate envelope... you do have to let the air out of it first. Further catharsis... I dunno, but it sounds theraputic to me!!!

  4. no such thing as coincidence, in my opinion.
    and nothing quite so satisfying and full of self-love as saying "not my problem" to someone trying to drag you into their drama. ahhh, enjoy. :)